TRIO World Academy - Things
you should not say to your kids during exam season
Exams have been elevated to monumental events in our
society. The stress from examinations seems to grow as a child passes through
school and then college. Parents can feel the heat from exam stress too. International school in Bangalore
Maybe you have flashbacks from your own childhood. Parental anxiety and
expectations inevitably transfer to the child, who apart from working to face
the examinations, must now live up to a certain standard set by their parents.
In fact, the whole family might be solely focused on the children's’
examination, affecting other priorities.
When tempers are
short and anxiety runs high, we might end up exchanging words we may regret and
cause long term harm to our child’s self-esteem. These may be good intentioned
words that can make your child feel undermined at this crucial juncture of
their school year. Staying calm can be a challenge during this season, schools
in Bangalore but it is well worth the efforts. Sitting down with the teachers
of your child’s international school
may be a great way to get a clear perspective on your child’s strengths and
challenges.
Here are some things
you must avoid saying, not just during exams, but at any point:
1. Why are you being so lazy? / Shouldn’t you
be studying?: Like any name-calling, labelling your child as lazy will not
motivate them to work harder, at least not willingly. It is a label that is the
opposite of successful, respectable, hard working and many other things that
our society holds in high regard. Being labeled lazy can cause much more harm
than you might expect. icse schools
in Bangalore
There could be many
factors why your child may not be studying. Instead of being vague and blunt,
consider these alternative scenarios: Is your child tired from putting in too
much effort? Are they too stressed out? Are they suffering from health issues?
Are there so many things on their plate right now that they are distracted? Sit
down with them and figure out the problem before prematurely labelling them as
lazy or incompetent. Preschools in hsr
layout
2. You are so dumb/stupid: As with other
labeling and name calling, an insensitive remark during a stressful time can
make a child believe that they are dumb or stupid and that it is a label they
are stuck with. You are not giving him/her any means to get out of the
situation they are in. day
care in hsr layout
3. Look at your sibling/peer. He/she is so
much better at… : How many of us like being compared to others? Not even
grownups appreciate being told that someone else is better than them. Being compared
to a sibling or a peer undercuts whatever your child has achieved, causing them
to think that their progress doesn’t matter.
4. You should be an
example to your sibling: Your child should be encouraged to excel at what is
right for them. The crucial point here is the happiness, growth and personal
success of your child, not aspirations for what they can be to someone else.
5. Your scores are
great but… “… Mr.K’s child got 4 marks
more” or “Who scored the highest?”. Similar to peer comparisons, telling a
child that they just fell short,even if their achievements are commendable, can
cause them to lose faith in their abilities and not value their achievements.
6. You are so smart. You will be able to score
well always: Telling a child that they are smart does boost their self-esteem,
but it also diminishes the value of effort. It also sets a standard that a
child may not always live up to. If they fail at a test, the child might think
that they are not smart anymore, instead of figuring out a new strategy to
improve their test scores. This might also make a child avoid taking up
challenges that they may fail at because of the ‘smart’ label they now have to
carry.
Taking care to avoid
using these phrases and questions in our conversations with our children can go
a long way in strengthening their self-confidence and aiding their studies at
an international school.
In the following
blog, we will talk about the things that you can say to your child more often.
Trio World Academy is
one of the best international schools in Bangalore offering IB PYP and IB
DP. For more details about IB DP
admissions at Trio World Academy, you can visit us here.
Visit us for more details:
Phone - +91 9663041122
Email - admissions@trioworldacademy.com
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